Appolo hospital report chance factor for cancer
scissor-89%
wills-68.3%
gold filter-42%
kings-23%
please forward this message to all smokers.
I am the best. I can prove it.
for example:i can see the tea in the tea cup, can u see the world in the world cup?
i can paste my passport size photo in a passport, can you paste your stamp size photo in stamp?
i can send my address to your mobile, can you send your mobile to my address..?
Man went for an interview the question was...
man-when is your birthday?
sadar-jan 11th
man-which year
sadar-what nonsence,every year.
Two lovers plan to suicide boy jumped first. girl closed her eyes and returned back say" love is blind" boy in air opened his parachute say "love never dies".
When words are not enough to express your feelings.. dont think you are in love you just need to join a english speaking courses..!
Never forward a sms from a friend to anthoer friend if your friend knows your other friend your friend who is a friend of your other friend might have already sent that sms to his friend who is your friend and other friend is the one to whom you should not forword what your friend sent you and your friend bcause your friend already got it from your friend who is your friend ok dont cry now.
chinese was in the hospital. Man went to meet him chinese said "ching wong mou chu qi" and died Man went china and found the meaning- "you are standing on the oxygen tube".
A small story Lion Cow and Monkey all are friends. Lion studing engineering. Cow studing law. Monkey studing this message now.
Cool fundamental of life.
save water and drink wine
love the neigbour but dont caught
one should love animals they are so tasty
money is not everything there is a mastercard and visa
every man should marry b coz hapiness is not only thing in life.
world shortest joke... "Two women's are sitting quietly".
who is cute? its you
who is jolly? its you
who is great? its you
who is smart? its you
who is sweetest? its you
and who is joking?of course its me
A house was on the fire with 25 people inside. A sadar went inside & saved 6 by pulling them out but he was jailed. Why? because all 6 were firemen.
Some men join the army because they are single and they like war... Many men join the army because they are married and they like peace.
Read it careful:tomorrow's yesterday is today yesterday's tomorrow is today.but today yesterday was yesterday's today. tomorrow's today is today's tomorrow.
Sorry for distrubing you at this time... if you are free now... if you in good mood now.... if you have no work... then please delete this message.
When i send you sms it doesn't mean you have to do the same. you can also send fruit, pizza, chocolates, cds, dvds, etc, cheques & cash is also acepted.
What do i do when i see someone xtreeeeeeeeemely good looking? I stare n stare n stare and i smile and smile and when i get tired, I put the Mirror down.
It takes 15 trees to produce the amount of paper what we use in one exam. join us to save trees "say no exams".
COOL FUNDAMENTALS OF LIFE, "money is not everything - You have mastercard $ visacard, one should love animals - they are tasty, save water - drink wine, love the neighbours - but dont get caught, every man should marry - happiness is not the only thing in life. ENJOY LIFE.....
SLEEPING DISORDER
causes - lecturer, frequent classroom exposure.
host - student
symptoms - frequent falling on the table, automatic closure of the eye.
chronic form - serious mucus discharge from the mouth.
pathogenesis - reddening of the eyes, mild closing of the eyes, short handwriting, loss of consciousness
diagnosis - by nearer person, sometimes by lecturer
Treatment - not yet invented.
Prevention - bunk the class.
Wife: Beggars are fraud now. I gave Rs.1 to a blind beggar and he said good bless you beautiful lady. How he know I am beautiful? Husband: sure he was a blind.
What is the difference between love marriage and arranged marriage? Love marriage is a perfect suicide, but arranges marriage is the planned.
Girls are like Ferrari cars, they are good to see and feel, Difficult to own and maintain.
Twinkle little bar, how I wonder what a bar, quarter rates are up so high, drink rum with chicken fry.
You are prayed oh god give me one bag full of money, a job, one big vehicle and many girls around me. God: your wish is fulfilled and you become a bus conductor.
God created sun and named sunlight. God created moon and named moonlight finally god created you and named tube light.
The youth now days are bad. A was in temple. A boy next to me lit a cigarette from the candle; I was shocked and dropped my beer bottle down.
Class rooms are train. 1st two benches are executives coaches (reserved for VIP) middle two are general compartment and last two are sleeper class.
Height of dreaming: bill gates came to me and asked, do you have window xp cd?
Man: I my dreams monkey play football every night. Doctor: take this medicine from tonight. Man: can I start from tomorrow because tonight is final.
Man: I think that girl is deaf. Man: how do you know? Man: I told I love her, but she told her chapels are new, girls are loose never fall into love.
Once a British men was filling up an application form for a job. He promptly filled the columns titled name, age, sex, etc. then he came to the column salary expected: he was not sure as to what to be filled there after much though he wrote: yes.
Alcohol contains female hormones proof: after drinking, men talk unnecessarily, become extra emotional, stop thinking and start fighting over nothing.
What is the difference between talent and intelligence? Walking on a tight rope above Niagara Falls is talent, not trying that is intelligence.
Tension: when wife is pregnant.
Terror: when girl friend is pregnant.
Horror: when both are pregnant.
Tragedy: when you are not responsible for both.
A boy throws a bottle of bournvita out of the window. A cat sees it, and takes the bottle of bournvita and buries it under the ground because cat buries bournvita.
Marriage is three ring circuses: 1.Engagement ring 2.wedding ring and 3.suffe'ring'.
Man went to exam. Question paper in yes or no type Man tosses coin for head he writes yes and for tail no. he finished exam in 10 minutes. Man again tosses the coin. Supervisor asked what you are doing. Man told I am checking the answer.
Teacher: what's cyclone?
Man: it's the loan given to purchase a cycle.
Murder of English: One English professor: When a girl dint does her assignment and gave an excuse: today you're lying with me tomorrow you will lie with someone else.
A husband made a call to hospital to enquire about his pregnant wife, but accidentally the call went to a cricket stadium, he asked what the condition is. He died after what he heard 7 are already out, 3 more will be out hopefully by lunch the first one was a duck.
Face your difficulties like a royal challenge only then you can ride on Success like a knight rider, charged up as Deccan charges and finally becomes a super king.
If a cat crossed you when you are going somewhere, it means. The cat is also going somewhere.
The sun makes moon shine. Current makes bulbs shine. Wax makes candle shine, but I am really confused, what makes you shine? It's harpic or domex.
Two Man looking at Egyptian mummy Man1: look so many bandages, its accident case. Man2: yes lorry number also written see B.C-1760.
Parents asked college watch man is this college good? He replied probably the best. I did my engineering here and got immediate placement.
Man traveled in a bus on 1st April when conductor asked for ticket, he gave rs.10 and took the ticket and shouted April fool, I have bus pass.
A girl asked her boyfriend to speak those three words which will make her fly in air and her feet won't be on earth, he answered, go hang yourself.
On engagement, girl father gave a note to boy; goods delivered once will not be taken back. Boy gave a note to girl's dad, condition not valid if seal is open.
You can impress everybody by your look and intelligence and if that is not enough, tell them you are my friend.
If a cat crossed you when you are going somewhere, it means. The cat is also going somewhere.
Miss. Universe was standing under a tree drinking cool drinks. An ant and his father were watching that from tree. Suddenly ant fell into drink which she drunk, then father ant came and told something and she stunned. Any guess? My son is now in your stomach.
Hey, if you are free can you call and talk to me? A big misunderstanding here. My father wants to talk to you. He does not believe me when I said monkey can talk.
To all my friends who are double: belated happy Valentines Day. To all my friends who are single happy Independence Day.
Five hi-tech Man inventions.
1. Waterproof towel.
2. Solar power torch.
3. Book on how to read.
4. Pedal power wheelchair.
5.umberella with holes to see if its rain.
A Man photographer focusing a dead body, suddenly all relatives started beating him. Do know why. Because he said, smile please.
Welcome to www.love.com
type password. *******
processing###########
Sorry you don't have age to love, so try to
www.pagotv.com
Briteesh rooled avar kantry far many ears. Dhey destraid avar kalchar, so wayt? Let as destroy dayr language lyke dis.
The fastest means of communication- telephone, television, tell-a-women.
Nice to read and follow: if you miss a girl don't fill your eyes with tears. It may hide yet another beautiful figure standing in front of you.
Love program:
#include(boy.h)
#include(girl.h)
void main()
{
int rose:
if (love=ok)
printf("rose");
escape();
}
A student was asked to write a signboard for the traffic rules near the school campus and he wrote "drive carefully, don't kill the students, wait for the teachers"
You are strong as rum, as fine as wine, as cool as beer, as classic as whisky, as sophisticated as vodka. Believe me I am totally drunk in your friendship.
Height of bad luck- I just wanted to kiss a beautiful, intelligent, smart, cute person on this earth, but what to do my lips can't touch my cheeks.
Just three steps to enjoy life CTRL + ALT+DEL.
1) CONtrol you girl friend.
2) look for ALTernative girl friend.
3) DELete the girl friend number who gives you tension.
A mother makes her son gentle in 20 years, but a girl makes him mental in 20 seconds.
Why a buffalo does always enjoys dirty water? Why? Why? Anyway, that's your personal matter.
In future how do I identify your kid in a class room? It's simple; I will check who's erasing his notes when teacher is erasing the board.
Try to fill this with yes/no/ok. 1. I am not human. 2. I don't have brain. 3. I don't have any sense. 4. I am stupid take your own time.
Tension: when wife is pregnant.
Terror: when girl friend is pregnant.
Horror: when both are pregnant.
Tragedy: when you are not responsible for both.
A boy throws a bottle of bournvita out of the window. A cat sees it, and takes the bottle of bournvita and buries it under the ground because cat buries bournvita.
Marriage is three ring circuses: 1.Engagement ring 2.wedding ring and 3.suffe'ring'.
Man went to exam. Question paper in yes or no type Man tosses coin for head he writes yes and for tail no. he finished exam in 10 minutes. Man again tosses the coin. Supervisor asked what you are doing. Man told I am checking the answer.
Teacher: what's cyclone?
Man: it's the loan given to purchase a cycle.
Murder of English: One English professor: When a girl dint does her assignment and gave an excuse: today you're lying with me tomorrow you will lie with someone else.
A husband made a call to hospital to enquire about his pregnant wife, but accidentally the call went to a cricket stadium, he asked what the condition is. He died after what he heard 7 are already out, 3 more will be out hopefully by lunch the first one was a duck.
Face your difficulties like a royal challenge only then you can ride on Success like a knight rider, charged up as Deccan charges and finally becomes a super king.
If a cat crossed you when you are going somewhere, it means. The cat is also going somewhere.
The sun makes moon shine. Current makes bulbs shine. Wax makes candle shine, but I am really confused, what makes you shine? It's harpic or domex.
Two Man looking at Egyptian mummy Man1: look so many bandages, its accident case. Man2: yes lorry number also written see B.C-1760.
Parents asked college watch man is this college good? He replied probably the best. I did my engineering here and got immediate placement.
Man traveled in a bus on 1st April when conductor asked for ticket, he gave rs.10 and took the ticket and shouted April fool, I have bus pass.
A girl asked her boyfriend to speak those three words which will make her fly in air and her feet won't be on earth, he answered, go hang yourself.
On engagement, girl father gave a note to boy; goods delivered once will not be taken back. Boy gave a note to girl's dad, condition not valid if seal is open.
You can impress everybody by your look and intelligence and if that is not enough, tell them you are my friend.
If a cat crossed you when you are going somewhere, it means. The cat is also going somewhere.
Miss. Universe was standing under a tree drinking cool drinks. An ant and his father were watching that from tree. Suddenly ant fell into drink which she drunk, then father ant came and told something and she stunned. Any guess? My son is now in your stomach.
Hey, if you are free can you call and talk to me? A big misunderstanding here. My father wants to talk to you. He does not believe me when I said monkey can talk.
To all my friends who are double: belated happy Valentines Day. To all my friends who are single happy Independence Day.
Five hi-tech Man inventions.
1. Waterproof towel.
2. Solar power torch.
3. Book on how to read.
4. Pedal power wheelchair.
5.umberella with holes to see if its rain.
A Man photographer focusing a dead body, suddenly all relatives started beating him. Do know why. Because he said, smile please.
Welcome to www.love.com
type password. *******
processing###########
Sorry you don't have age to love, so try to
www.pagotv.com
Briteesh rooled avar kantry far many ears. Dhey destraid avar kalchar, so wayt? Let as destroy dayr language lyke dis.
The fastest means of communication- telephone, television, tell-a-women.
Nice to read and follow: if you miss a girl don't fill your eyes with tears. It may hide yet another beautiful figure standing in front of you.
Love program:
#include(boy.h)
#include(girl.h)
void main()
{
int rose:
if (love=ok)
printf("rose");
escape();
}
A student was asked to write a signboard for the traffic rules near the school campus and he wrote "drive carefully, don't kill the students, wait for the teachers"
You are strong as rum, as fine as wine, as cool as beer, as classic as whisky, as sophisticated as vodka. Believe me I am totally drunk in your friendship.
Height of bad luck- I just wanted to kiss a beautiful, intelligent, smart, cute person on this earth, but what to do my lips can't touch my cheeks.
Just three steps to enjoy life CTRL + ALT+DEL.
1) CONtrol you girl friend.
2) look for ALTernative girl friend.
3) DELete the girl friend number who gives you tension.
A mother makes her son gentle in 20 years, but a girl makes him mental in 20 seconds.
Why a buffalo does always enjoys dirty water? Why? Why? Anyway, that's your personal matter.
In future how do I identify your kid in a class room? It's simple; I will check who's erasing his notes when teacher is erasing the board.
Try to fill this with yes/no/ok. 1. I am not human. 2. I don't have brain. 3. I don't have any sense. 4. I am stupid take your own time.
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