Collections of more funny sms and funnysms messages from smsgalore.com

"The most painful moment: "When 1 of you girlfriend calls you in morning& your grandmother picks up the phone & say: He is in toilet..."

"A boy refused to be the President of the USA because they could not change the capital of USA from Washington DC to Chennai.... "

"If your Lover sends u Romantic Messages den be very Happy, But think who is sending those Messages to your Lover? My job is over."

"A Student after checking his Result... What the Hell...? I have failed...? That too in English...? . . . . . . . "UNPOSSIBLE...!"

"A taxi passenger touched the driver on shoulder to ask something Driver screamed, lost control of the car, went up on the footpath & Stopped few centimeters from a shop
The driver said: "Don't ever do that again, you scared me"
passenger apologized and said: "I didn't realize a little touch would scare you so much"
Driver replied: "Sorry, it's not your fault, Its my 1st day as a Cab driver. I've been driving a van carrying dead bodies for last 25 yrs"

"If you happen to love a girl or boy, try from another state.. even if it fails, you will end up with one more language in your resume."

"Define LOVE and explain in details. (10 marks) Definition : A serious disorder of heart due to relationship between men & women that can cause death of 1 or both depending on the resistance associated. TYPES: 1 sided & 2 sided AGE: *Usually occurs in teen ages but nowadays can be found in any age.! SYMPTOMS: Tension Daydreaming Insomnia Phone Addiction DIAGNOSIS BY: Diary Photos Mobile TREATMENT: Anti-LOVE Shoe/Mother's slipper".

"He Broke Her Heart.. And She Broke His iphone 4G.. I think We All Know Who Cried Harder.."

"A scientific joke: What will you call 3rd edition of Nano car? . . . . . . . Sodium nitritecoz it will be NaNO3".

"Today's Joke- . . . . . . A girl said . . . . . . . Trust me!! ".

"Wife: Look At that drunkard. Husband: Who is he? Wife: 10yrs back he proposed me & I rejected him Husband: Oh my god, he is still celebrating."

Commerce professor asks the student: what is the most important source of finance for starting business? Student: "Father in law".

DUAL HEART ATTACK MESSAGE BY A GIRL to her lover.. 1st message- lets break up now, its all over.. 2nd msg.-sorry, sorry!! That was not 4 u....

How to kill a girl? Give her a beautiful dress, nice jewellery, costly cosmetics Then lock her in a room without a mirror Finish..

Marry a girl who cooks well..! Marry a girl who cares 4 u.! Marry a girl who love us. & one important thing Make sure that d 3 girls don’t meet each other.......

Girl :- Its very difficult to love a "BANKER" ... FRIEND :- why?... Girl :- He rejected my love letter with reason of "Signature differs" n returned.

I was born intelligent. BUT EDUCATION SPOILED ME. EDUCATION MADE ME TO THINK UNWANTED THING s: A question in 11th physics book.. What is the work?

A guy sitting with his lover, drinking beer says," i lov you! " LOVER:-" is it you or the beer talking? Boy rplys," its me, talking to my beer, you shut up!!".

A LKG boy attended an Interview in Motor Company... Interviewer: How the motors run? Boy: (Thank God very easy question), simple sir, Durrrrrrrrrrrr.......

An innocent husband said: I watch my wedding video in reverse. I love d End, when she takes out ring, goes out, sits in car & goes back to her father home.

Once there was a fight between Me and a Tiger.. I Ran away.. Why? To Save the Tiger.. Only 1411 r left Otherwise you knows me..!.

A British Man Was eating 'pizza' In his Office, On the 13'th Floor.. A Man Came Running and Shouted, 'Peter' Your Daughter 'Roselin' Just Died In An Accident. He Didn’t Know what To Do., He Jumped from His Office Window.. When He Was Near The 10th Floor He Remembered He Didn’t Have a Daughter. When He Was Near d 5th Floor He Remembered He Was Not Married. When He Was About To Hit the Ground He Remembered that He Was Not 'Peter'.

A boy was teaching maths to a girl. He kissed her, again he kissed her & said this is addition. Then they kissed each other & said this is multiplication. Suddenly the girls dad came beat the boy, throw him away saying this is called division...!

2. A Boy Went 2 Doctor Wid Infection on His face. After Checking, Doctor Said: "Ask ur GF 2 change her lipstick Brand, u r Allergetic to lakme"..

Only 842 girls are left for every 1000 boys!!;-) Save girls! We can save the tigers later.

Face /your/on/smile/ little/a/get/to/ trick /my/only/was/ this/but/me/ with/angry/get/will/you/message/ this/reading/ After/ (Now Read in reverse)....

TO ALL STUDENTS: Smooth road never make good drivers.. Clear sky never makes good pilots.. & CLEARING all subjects in 1 attempt never makes Good STUDENT...!-

Dear facebook, just wait & watch, some day they will all leave you too. Yours lovingly, Orkut…

Sweet Heart Boy: U r sunshine of my life without U life is cloudy U r in my heart like rainy water 4 barren land Girl: Is it proposal or weather report?

Whats difference between Exam and Proposing your love? In Exam nothng in mind But we have to Xpress, But In Proposal lots of thngs are in Mind but we Cnt Xpres it.

Why? smart people always say they are Busy... ? Think? ? ? ? ? ? I will Tell You Later. Now I'm Busy...!

Facebook addiction:
Dad writes on sons wall: Son.. How are you? Your Mom and i am fine and we muss you a alot. We wish to see you, so please turn off your pc and come to downstairs to have lunch.

Couple silent in bed.
Wife thinks : Why is he not talking to me? Is he thinking of another woman? Does he like someone else? Is he seeing someone? Don't I appeal to him anymore? Are wrinkles showing on my face? Is he trying to dump me? Is he now finding me ugly? Have I put on weight at the wrong places? Does my make up repel him these days. Is he upset with my nagging?
WHY IS HE UPSET?

Husband thinks :Why the hell did Dhoni give the last over to Nehra?

Once an angle appears before a girl and grants her 3 wishes, under the condition that her boyfriend gets 10 times what she gets. The girl asks these wishes.
1. I must be rich; this made her boyfriend before 10 times rich.
2. I must become beautiful; this made her boy friend very smart.
3. I must get a mild heart attack.
Moral: girls are really smart. Story ends here for girls.
Guys read on. The boy friend gets a heart attack 10 times milder.
Moral: girls think they are smart, but they are stupid.

Lkg boy on his way to home with his mom, saw a couple kissing on the road? He suddenly shouted and said, look mom, they are fighting for chewing gum.

Mr. santa falls in a sea he seems a fish and throws it to land and says I am going to die, at least you save your life.

Height of coolness: Two friends finishing the paper, coming out of the exam hall, having a cool drinks and talking.
1st: dude which paper was it?
2nd: may be maths.
1st: that means you did the paper?
2nd: no man the girl next to me was using calculator.

Two terrorist were having a discussion in a bar.
A boy walks in and asks them, what is discussion is about?
Terrorist: we are planning to kill 14 crore people and a donkey.
Guy: why a donkey?
Then one terrorist tells the others. See I told you, nobody will care about the 14 crore people.

Man asked sculptor how you make idols from stone. He replied idols and images are already hidden there, I remove unwanted stone only.

When I was studying lkg, teacher asked me "I have four apples how I can divide it among five children?" I answered "kill one child".

I really appreciate your brain, which is divided into two parts. Right and left. 1. In right nothing is left. 2. in left

When I drink I feel ashamed, then I look at the beer bottle and think of the workers in the beer factory, their hopes, families and dreams. If people like me do not drink then they will be jobless. It's good to live for others, don't forget the pickle industry family so take the side dish also.

When will we all come true? Life smiled and replied, never because the day all of you come true, I will lose my meaning.

Can a woman make you a millionaire? Yea if you are a billionaire!!!!!!

I like your smile because.......... I like yellow.

Tow rules of boys: they never give lift to any unknown girl.2 they never think any girl as unknown!

Maths teacher: if 1000kgs=ton. Then for 3000kgs=how much student: ton, ton, ton.

For a boys like it's easier to pick up girl of weight 50kg, but for the same its quiet difficult to pick up a gas cylinder of weight 14.2kg.

If your lover sends you romantic message don't be very happy. But think who is sending those lovely messages to your lover? My job over.

In a bar one guy says to another" I love your mom and want to marry" the whole bar was waiting for the other guy's response. He laughs and says lets go home dad, you drunk more.

Boy: I like that girl. His friend: she has a boy friend. Boy: look. A goal post always has a goalkeeper, but that doesn't mean you can't score goals.

I wanted to kill the sweetest smartest and the most beautiful person on the earth, but then I thought SUICIDE is a crime.

For a boy like you it's easier to pick up girl of Wight 50kg, but for the same its quiet difficult to pick up a gas cylinder of weight 14.2kg strange???

A newly married husband saved his wife number on his mobile as my life, after one year of marriage, it was found changed to my wife, after two years of marriage home, after five years, Hitler and after ten years wrong number.

Technical beauty tips: if you want to remove your pimples, face mark and the signs of skin try adobe Photoshop.

Boy: my girlfriend broke up with me and sent me pictures of her with her new boyfriend for irritating me. Friend: really bad! What did u do? Boy I sent them to her dad.

The real problem doesn't start when a boy starts looking at a girl it begins when she smiles and looks back at the boy.

Boy: your name seems to be very small. So can I add my name with your name?

There are two kinds of roads in America. National and international. In india also two roads under construction and take diversion.

Presence of mind: After slapping wife, husband says a person only beats whom he actually loves, angry wife slaps him twice and says, do you think that my love is lesser?

One boy looks into girls purse in a classroom. She says its bad manner. He says its not. Girl: why? Because members of the same class can access private data.

Do not search for good people all over the world, because I am in my home.Do not search for good people all over the world, because I am in my home

Letters by a little kid who hates maths: dear maths, please grow up and so, love your own problem don't depends on others.

Silence is the best answer for all the questions. Smile is the best reaction in all situations, unfortunately both of them never helps in interview.

Behind very successful student there is one good teacher. But what about failed student ? A beautiful teacher.

Why smart people always say they are busy think, I will tell you later. Right now, I am busy.

Three harmful substances that irritates eye:
1. Atmosphere dust.
2. Question paper.
3. Our college girls over scene,
we cannot tolerate them.

When ship was sinking, Italian passenger asks Indian, how far is land? Indian: 2kms. Italian jumps into sea and asks which direction. Indian: downwards..

Dad: A sincere traffic police was suspended from his ob.
Son: why?
Dad: because he charged ambulance for over speed.

Millions of people write love letters. But everyone sends their 1st love letter to me always. Just imagine how beautiful I am. Said by dustbin.

Ultimate engineering: which is the most popular machine that engineering students frequently use? .. Think........ Xerox machine!!!

Poem of poor child: I saw many shirts in opposite home window, but I saw many window in my shirts.

My son always wants me to hit a six every time. May be he is watching sehwag too much.

Height of shock: A boy was sitting with girlfriend saw a guys photo in her bag and asked whether he is your X-boy friends? Girl kissed him and said, no that me before operation.

A+A =double A,
E+E =double E,
V+V=double V,
U+U=double U,
W+W=?????

Get up all you lazy people and do something for the nation. Oh sorry it was you?? Go back to sleep that will be better for the nation.

Intellectual question: if swimming is a good exercise to stay slim, why do whales look fat?

If you want success in life, be sweet as honey, be regular as clock, be fresh as rose, be soft as tissue, be strong as rock, be sure as death, and be smart as me.

Love story of arts student: a guy was deeply in love with his classmate. One day he told her that he loves her a lot, but she was angry and refused. One day she borrowed a text book from him and wrote that she is an orphan and not to leave her but the guy never talked to her. 4 years passed. She was sad. Actually the boy was still in love with her but that she hates him because, he never saw her writing. Moral: arts college guys never open their text books.

Room free lunch free breakfast free dinner free security free enjoy this life only in central jail contact dial 100 (toll free)

If Columbus had a girl friend he might have never discovered America because
GF: where are you going?
With whom?
How you going?
To discover what?
Why only you?
What should I do when you are gone?
Can I come with you?
When will you back?
Where will you stay?
You will miss me na?
Columbus:?????

Boy: from the day I am your lover, I am not able to eat, drink.
girl: how sweet, so you are madly in love with me.
boy shut up!! You made my pocket empty

Mom: who is tipu sultan?
Son: I don't know.
mom: concentrate on your studies you will know.
Son: who is pooja aunty?
Mom: I don't know.
son: concentrate on your husband you will know

The unbeatable message what is longer than wife's love? What is lovely than sister fight? Which pillow is better than a lover lap? What warmr than dad's hug? What sweeter ten a baby's kiss? What tastier than mom cooking what stronger than a friends shoulder? Nothing these all have no substitutes never miss it

Advantages of not having lover! can sleep well,2 can save time and money3 no worry about how you look 4no missed calls in mid night. No need to recharge twice a day.6 can talk two all boys and girls,.8 the most important can forward this to all

Mechanics wife delivered a baby, wife send sms to husband. "Your spare part came out". Husband smsed and asked" with gear or without gear"

"They gave me the questions which I don't. so I wrote answer which they don't know..

Fear is that deep wrenching feelings in your stomach when pages of your book still smell new and one hour left for your exams

Best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who wasn't my wife. Audience was in shock and silence. He added. She was my mother. Applause and laughter. A top manager tried this at home. After a drink, he said loudly to his wife, in kitchen: best year of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who wasn't my wife. Standing a moment trying to recall the 2nd half, he finally blurted out: I can't remember, I can't remember who was she? By the time he regained his senses, he was in hospital.

Height of addiction just before a prisoner's execution the officer asked him about his last request. He said I want to update my facebook status.

Once a smoker was smoking at airport. A gentleman arrives and asked him: how much do you smoke a day?
Smoker: why?
Gentleman: if you would have collected the money instead of smoking the plane which is in front of you, would been yours.
Smoker: is this plane yours?
Gentleman: no.
smoker: thanks for your advice, but that plane is mine.
Moral: don't advice unnecessary.

Santa: I kiss my wife every day before leaving the office. What about you? Banta: I too, after you leave.

"The most romantic state in our country? It's in Tamilnadu. You know why? Every night is a light dinner. Thanks to our TNEB.

"You must bring the change!!!! Great lines said by bus conductor..

Whenever you're in trouble go to your parents for a sound advice you will get. 99% sound and 1% advice.

Her diary: he seemed very quiet today I asked hem if it was my fault that he was upset, he said no I told him d love him but he smiled sadly I am sure he think of someone else he didn't call are texted me I cried all night long. His diary CSK lost the mach again.

Wife hints to husband for a new car-"dear, buy me something that goes 0 to 100 in a 3 seconds when I am on it.., "husband gifted..? a weighing machine..,

man1: why are you running so fast? Man 2: to deliver this letter urgently.man1: where? Man 2: no time to read the address. man 1: ok go fast.

___ is the first word comes from your heart when you think about me... Be frank don't joke. Send to your friends and get shocking replies.

Don't forget me, forger me never, when u forget me, then forget me forever.

Creativity joke: vegetables and fruits sale are in platform..! But. shoes and slippers sale are in a/c rooms What a funny world..

Why did raja take his pregnant wife jeeto to pizza hut? Because they advertised free delivery.

News: chimps escaped from the zoo 1 were caught watching TV another playing football and the 3rd one was caught reading this text message.

What is study?
s=sitting
t=talking
u=unlimited
d=dreaming
y=yawning.
So study well. oh god i have to study more.

A line from a love failure diary: she changed my every habit by teasing me all the time finally she left me saying that you are changed lot.

This is miracle that happened recently at pune. A boy named ashish and a girl named janavi loved sincerely. They used to chat on mobile four hours. In order to reduce the expenses, both got same network sim. The guy went abroad for a month due to his work. The girl died in an accident, the girl's last wish was to bury her along with her mobile. After a month the guy called the girls mom and said "aunty I will be coming tomorrow, I want this to be a surprise. So don't tell jaanu" the lady didn't know what to say. The next day the guy came and asked about jannu.. they told him about her death but he said "don't joke, I spoke with her yesterday" nobody believed. Suddenly the gugs mobile rang and displayed" jaanu calling "he activated the speaker. It was clearly jannu's voice then they realized that girl was using Vodafone sim "wherever u go the network follows "thanks for wasting your time for reading this message.

Silly but truth: if power's gone in America they call eb office.. in japan they test fuse. but in India they will see neighbor's home.

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Home Submit your sms Advice sms messages Birthday sms messages Christmas sms messages Funny sms messages Friendship sms messages General sms messages Love sms messages New year sms messages Religious sms messages Riddle sms messages Good morning sms Good night sms messages Wise sms messages Sexy & adult sms messages Sexy sms messages funnysms messages tags funnysms funny sms funny sms messages funny messages funnysms messages	Funny Sms Messages "The most painful moment: "When 1 of you girlfriend calls you in morning& your grandmother picks up the phone & say: He is in toilet..." "A boy refused to be the President of the USA because they could not change the capital of USA from Washington DC to Chennai.... " "If your Lover sends u Romantic Messages den be very Happy, But think who is sending those Messages to your Lover? My job is over." "A Student after checking his Result... What the Hell...? I have failed...? That too in English...? . . . . . . . "UNPOSSIBLE...!" "A taxi passenger touched the driver on shoulder to ask something Driver screamed, lost control of the car, went up on the footpath & Stopped few centimeters from a shop The driver said: "Don't ever do that again, you scared me" passenger apologized and said: "I didn't realize a little touch would scare you so much" Driver replied: "Sorry, it's not your fault, Its my 1st day as a Cab driver. I've been driving a van carrying dead bodies for last 25 yrs" "If you happen to love a girl or boy, try from another state.. even if it fails, you will end up with one more language in your resume." "Define LOVE and explain in details. (10 marks) Definition : A serious disorder of heart due to relationship between men & women that can cause death of 1 or both depending on the resistance associated. TYPES: 1 sided & 2 sided AGE: Usually occurs in teen ages but nowadays can be found in any age.! SYMPTOMS: Tension Daydreaming Insomnia Phone Addiction DIAGNOSIS BY: Diary Photos Mobile TREATMENT: Anti-LOVE Shoe/Mother's slipper". "He Broke Her Heart.. And She Broke His iphone 4G.. I think We All Know Who Cried Harder.." "A scientific joke: What will you call 3rd edition of Nano car? . . . . . . . Sodium nitritecoz it will be NaNO3". "Today's Joke- . . . . . . A girl said . . . . . . . Trust me!! ". "Wife: Look At that drunkard. Husband: Who is he? Wife: 10yrs back he proposed me & I rejected him Husband: Oh my god, he is still celebrating." Commerce professor asks the student: what is the most important source of finance for starting business? Student: "Father in law". DUAL HEART ATTACK MESSAGE BY A GIRL to her lover.. 1st message- lets break up now, its all over.. 2nd msg.-sorry, sorry!! That was not 4 u.... How to kill a girl? Give her a beautiful dress, nice jewellery, costly cosmetics Then lock her in a room without a mirror Finish.. Marry a girl who cooks well..! Marry a girl who cares 4 u.! Marry a girl who love us. & one important thing Make sure that d 3 girls don’t meet each other....... Girl :- Its very difficult to love a "BANKER" ... FRIEND :- why?... Girl :- He rejected my love letter with reason of "Signature differs" n returned. I was born intelligent. BUT EDUCATION SPOILED ME. EDUCATION MADE ME TO THINK UNWANTED THING s: A question in 11th physics book.. What is the work? A guy sitting with his lover, drinking beer says," i lov you! " LOVER:-" is it you or the beer talking? Boy rplys," its me, talking to my beer, you shut up!!". A LKG boy attended an Interview in Motor Company... Interviewer: How the motors run? Boy: (Thank God very easy question), simple sir, Durrrrrrrrrrrr....... An innocent husband said: I watch my wedding video in reverse. I love d End, when she takes out ring, goes out, sits in car & goes back to her father home. Once there was a fight between Me and a Tiger.. I Ran away.. Why? To Save the Tiger.. Only 1411 r left Otherwise you knows me..!. A British Man Was eating 'pizza' In his Office, On the 13'th Floor.. A Man Came Running and Shouted, 'Peter' Your Daughter 'Roselin' Just Died In An Accident. He Didn’t Know what To Do., He Jumped from His Office Window.. When He Was Near The 10th Floor He Remembered He Didn’t Have a Daughter. When He Was Near d 5th Floor He Remembered He Was Not Married. When He Was About To Hit the Ground He Remembered that He Was Not 'Peter'. A boy was teaching maths to a girl. He kissed her, again he kissed her & said this is addition. Then they kissed each other & said this is multiplication. Suddenly the girls dad came beat the boy, throw him away saying this is called division...! 2. A Boy Went 2 Doctor Wid Infection on His face. After Checking, Doctor Said: "Ask ur GF 2 change her lipstick Brand, u r Allergetic to lakme".. Only 842 girls are left for every 1000 boys!!;-) Save girls! We can save the tigers later. Face /your/on/smile/ little/a/get/to/ trick /my/only/was/ this/but/me/ with/angry/get/will/you/message/ this/reading/ After/ (Now Read in reverse).... TO ALL STUDENTS:* Smooth road never make good drivers.. Clear sky never makes good pilots.. & CLEARING all subjects in 1 attempt never makes Good STUDENT...!- Dear facebook, just wait & watch, some day they will all leave you too. Yours lovingly, Orkut… Sweet Heart Boy: U r sunshine of my life without U life is cloudy U r in my heart like rainy water 4 barren land Girl: Is it proposal or weather report? Whats difference between Exam and Proposing your love? In Exam nothng in mind But we have to Xpress, But In Proposal lots of thngs are in Mind but we Cnt Xpres it. Why? smart people always say they are Busy... ? Think? ? ? ? ? ? I will Tell You Later. Now I'm Busy...! Facebook addiction: Dad writes on sons wall: Son.. How are you? Your Mom and i am fine and we muss you a alot. We wish to see you, so please turn off your pc and come to downstairs to have lunch. Couple silent in bed. Wife thinks : Why is he not talking to me? Is he thinking of another woman? Does he like someone else? Is he seeing someone? Don't I appeal to him anymore? Are wrinkles showing on my face? Is he trying to dump me? Is he now finding me ugly? Have I put on weight at the wrong places? Does my make up repel him these days. Is he upset with my nagging? WHY IS HE UPSET? Husband thinks :Why the hell did Dhoni give the last over to Nehra? Once an angle appears before a girl and grants her 3 wishes, under the condition that her boyfriend gets 10 times what she gets. The girl asks these wishes. 1. I must be rich; this made her boyfriend before 10 times rich. 2. I must become beautiful; this made her boy friend very smart. 3. I must get a mild heart attack. Moral: girls are really smart. Story ends here for girls. Guys read on. The boy friend gets a heart attack 10 times milder. Moral: girls think they are smart, but they are stupid. Lkg boy on his way to home with his mom, saw a couple kissing on the road? He suddenly shouted and said, look mom, they are fighting for chewing gum. Mr. santa falls in a sea he seems a fish and throws it to land and says I am going to die, at least you save your life. Height of coolness: Two friends finishing the paper, coming out of the exam hall, having a cool drinks and talking. 1st: dude which paper was it? 2nd: may be maths. 1st: that means you did the paper? 2nd: no man the girl next to me was using calculator. Two terrorist were having a discussion in a bar. A boy walks in and asks them, what is discussion is about? Terrorist: we are planning to kill 14 crore people and a donkey. Guy: why a donkey? Then one terrorist tells the others. See I told you, nobody will care about the 14 crore people. Man asked sculptor how you make idols from stone. He replied idols and images are already hidden there, I remove unwanted stone only. When I was studying lkg, teacher asked me "I have four apples how I can divide it among five children?" I answered "kill one child". I really appreciate your brain, which is divided into two parts. Right and left. 1. In right nothing is left. 2. in left When I drink I feel ashamed, then I look at the beer bottle and think of the workers in the beer factory, their hopes, families and dreams. If people like me do not drink then they will be jobless. It's good to live for others, don't forget the pickle industry family so take the side dish also. When will we all come true? Life smiled and replied, never because the day all of you come true, I will lose my meaning. Can a woman make you a millionaire? Yea if you are a billionaire!!!!!! I like your smile because.......... I like yellow. Tow rules of boys: they never give lift to any unknown girl.2 they never think any girl as unknown! Maths teacher: if 1000kgs=ton. Then for 3000kgs=how much student: ton, ton, ton. For a boys like it's easier to pick up girl of weight 50kg, but for the same its quiet difficult to pick up a gas cylinder of weight 14.2kg. If your lover sends you romantic message don't be very happy. But think who is sending those lovely messages to your lover? My job over. In a bar one guy says to another" I love your mom and want to marry" the whole bar was waiting for the other guy's response. He laughs and says lets go home dad, you drunk more. Boy: I like that girl. His friend: she has a boy friend. Boy: look. A goal post always has a goalkeeper, but that doesn't mean you can't score goals. I wanted to kill the sweetest smartest and the most beautiful person on the earth, but then I thought SUICIDE is a crime. For a boy like you it's easier to pick up girl of Wight 50kg, but for the same its quiet difficult to pick up a gas cylinder of weight 14.2kg strange??? A newly married husband saved his wife number on his mobile as my life, after one year of marriage, it was found changed to my wife, after two years of marriage home, after five years, Hitler and after ten years wrong number. Technical beauty tips: if you want to remove your pimples, face mark and the signs of skin try adobe Photoshop. Boy: my girlfriend broke up with me and sent me pictures of her with her new boyfriend for irritating me. Friend: really bad! What did u do? Boy I sent them to her dad. The real problem doesn't start when a boy starts looking at a girl it begins when she smiles and looks back at the boy. Boy: your name seems to be very small. So can I add my name with your name? There are two kinds of roads in America. National and international. In india also two roads under construction and take diversion. Presence of mind: After slapping wife, husband says a person only beats whom he actually loves, angry wife slaps him twice and says, do you think that my love is lesser? One boy looks into girls purse in a classroom. She says its bad manner. He says its not. Girl: why? Because members of the same class can access private data. Do not search for good people all over the world, because I am in my home.Do not search for good people all over the world, because I am in my home Letters by a little kid who hates maths: dear maths, please grow up and so, love your own problem don't depends on others. Silence is the best answer for all the questions. Smile is the best reaction in all situations, unfortunately both of them never helps in interview. Behind very successful student there is one good teacher. But what about failed student ? A beautiful teacher. Why smart people always say they are busy think, I will tell you later. Right now, I am busy. Three harmful substances that irritates eye: 1. Atmosphere dust. 2. Question paper. 3. Our college girls over scene, we cannot tolerate them. When ship was sinking, Italian passenger asks Indian, how far is land? Indian: 2kms. Italian jumps into sea and asks which direction. Indian: downwards.. Dad: A sincere traffic police was suspended from his ob. Son: why? Dad: because he charged ambulance for over speed. Millions of people write love letters. But everyone sends their 1st love letter to me always. Just imagine how beautiful I am. Said by dustbin. Ultimate engineering: which is the most popular machine that engineering students frequently use? .. Think........ Xerox machine!!! Poem of poor child: I saw many shirts in opposite home window, but I saw many window in my shirts. My son always wants me to hit a six every time. May be he is watching sehwag too much. Height of shock: A boy was sitting with girlfriend saw a guys photo in her bag and asked whether he is your X-boy friends? Girl kissed him and said, no that me before operation. A+A =double A, E+E =double E, V+V=double V, U+U=double U, W+W=????? Get up all you lazy people and do something for the nation. Oh sorry it was you?? Go back to sleep that will be better for the nation. Intellectual question: if swimming is a good exercise to stay slim, why do whales look fat? If you want success in life, be sweet as honey, be regular as clock, be fresh as rose, be soft as tissue, be strong as rock, be sure as death, and be smart as me. Love story of arts student: a guy was deeply in love with his classmate. One day he told her that he loves her a lot, but she was angry and refused. One day she borrowed a text book from him and wrote that she is an orphan and not to leave her but the guy never talked to her. 4 years passed. She was sad. Actually the boy was still in love with her but that she hates him because, he never saw her writing. Moral: arts college guys never open their text books. Room free lunch free breakfast free dinner free security free enjoy this life only in central jail contact dial 100 (toll free) If Columbus had a girl friend he might have never discovered America because GF: where are you going? With whom? How you going? To discover what? Why only you? What should I do when you are gone? Can I come with you? When will you back? Where will you stay? You will miss me na? Columbus:????? Boy: from the day I am your lover, I am not able to eat, drink. girl: how sweet, so you are madly in love with me. boy shut up!! You made my pocket empty Mom: who is tipu sultan? Son: I don't know. mom: concentrate on your studies you will know. Son: who is pooja aunty? Mom: I don't know. son: concentrate on your husband you will know The unbeatable message what is longer than wife's love? What is lovely than sister fight? Which pillow is better than a lover lap? What warmr than dad's hug? What sweeter ten a baby's kiss? What tastier than mom cooking what stronger than a friends shoulder? Nothing these all have no substitutes never miss it Advantages of not having lover! can sleep well,2 can save time and money3 no worry about how you look 4no missed calls in mid night. No need to recharge twice a day.6 can talk two all boys and girls,.8 the most important can forward this to all Mechanics wife delivered a baby, wife send sms to husband. "Your spare part came out". Husband smsed and asked" with gear or without gear" "They gave me the questions which I don't. so I wrote answer which they don't know.. Fear is that deep wrenching feelings in your stomach when pages of your book still smell new and one hour left for your exams Best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who wasn't my wife. Audience was in shock and silence. He added. She was my mother. Applause and laughter. A top manager tried this at home. After a drink, he said loudly to his wife, in kitchen: best year of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who wasn't my wife. Standing a moment trying to recall the 2nd half, he finally blurted out: I can't remember, I can't remember who was she? By the time he regained his senses, he was in hospital. Height of addiction just before a prisoner's execution the officer asked him about his last request. He said I want to update my facebook status. Once a smoker was smoking at airport. A gentleman arrives and asked him: how much do you smoke a day? Smoker: why? Gentleman: if you would have collected the money instead of smoking the plane which is in front of you, would been yours. Smoker: is this plane yours? Gentleman: no. smoker: thanks for your advice, but that plane is mine. Moral: don't advice unnecessary. Santa: I kiss my wife every day before leaving the office. What about you? Banta: I too, after you leave. "The most romantic state in our country? It's in Tamilnadu. You know why? Every night is a light dinner. Thanks to our TNEB. "You must bring the change!!!! Great lines said by bus conductor.. Whenever you're in trouble go to your parents for a sound advice you will get. 99% sound and 1% advice. Her diary: he seemed very quiet today I asked hem if it was my fault that he was upset, he said no I told him d love him but he smiled sadly I am sure he think of someone else he didn't call are texted me I cried all night long. His diary CSK lost the mach again. Wife hints to husband for a new car-"dear, buy me something that goes 0 to 100 in a 3 seconds when I am on it.., "husband gifted..? a weighing machine.., man1: why are you running so fast? Man 2: to deliver this letter urgently.man1: where? Man 2: no time to read the address. man 1: ok go fast. ___ is the first word comes from your heart when you think about me... Be frank don't joke. Send to your friends and get shocking replies. Don't forget me, forger me never, when u forget me, then forget me forever. Creativity joke: vegetables and fruits sale are in platform..! But. shoes and slippers sale are in a/c rooms What a funny world.. Why did raja take his pregnant wife jeeto to pizza hut? Because they advertised free delivery. News: chimps escaped from the zoo 1 were caught watching TV another playing football and the 3rd one was caught reading this text message. What is study? s=sitting t=talking u=unlimited d=dreaming y=yawning. So study well. oh god i have to study more. A line from a love failure diary: she changed my every habit by teasing me all the time finally she left me saying that you are changed lot. This is miracle that happened recently at pune. A boy named ashish and a girl named janavi loved sincerely. They used to chat on mobile four hours. In order to reduce the expenses, both got same network sim. The guy went abroad for a month due to his work. The girl died in an accident, the girl's last wish was to bury her along with her mobile. After a month the guy called the girls mom and said "aunty I will be coming tomorrow, I want this to be a surprise. So don't tell jaanu" the lady didn't know what to say. The next day the guy came and asked about jannu.. they told him about her death but he said "don't joke, I spoke with her yesterday" nobody believed. Suddenly the gugs mobile rang and displayed" jaanu calling "he activated the speaker. It was clearly jannu's voice then they realized that girl was using Vodafone sim "wherever u go the network follows "thanks for wasting your time for reading this message. Silly but truth: if power's gone in America they call eb office.. in japan they test fuse. but in India they will see neighbor's home. 1 2 3 4 5 NEXT
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